Filing for divorce is a decision that should not be taken lightly. If you think your marriage is on the brink of death, you have three options: try to mend it, file a divorce, or do nothing about it and let it die a natural death. To help you decide, we round up the most significant warning signs that will tell you if it’s time to call it quits with your spouse.
You’re Being Abused
Domestic violence is something that no one should have to put up with. If you’re being abused mentally or physically, you don’t need more red flags to file for a divorce. Although change is possible for abusers, it’s not always realistic to expect that they will.
When leaving an abusive spouse, though, experts advise creating a safety plan for you and your children. According to a study by the University of Arizona, there’s a higher risk of violence after divorce.
The pattern of abuse is more likely to increase within the first three to 12 months after separation. To ensure your safety, call the National Domestic Violence Hotline and consult your divorce lawyer in Colorado Springs.
There Are Too Many Unresolved Issues
Issues stay unresolved for a lot of reasons. For one, it could be that you are avoiding conflict because you’re tired of arguing about the same things over and over. Whenever you try to sit down and talk, you both end up blaming each other instead of keeping an open ear and compromising. You could also feel constantly put down and criticized by your partner that you’d resort to showing a passive-aggressive behavior instead of letting yourself be vulnerable.
A healthy relationship is one that is nurtured with constant care and communication. If one of you is emotionally disengaged in the relationship, even after too many attempts to resolve your differences, it’s time to accept that the marriage has gone sour.
One of You Is Having an Affair
Like domestic violence, infidelity is a strong reason to end a relationship. This could make anyone lose self-esteem, feel an overwhelming sense of rejection, and develop trauma. But experts say that marriages can still be rebuilt after an affair.
If both of you are committed to holding yourself accountable for your mistakes, facing your fears, and seeking the support you need, it’s possible to reconcile struggles and authentically heal from past events. However, it’s time to end the marriage if:
- You’ve lost all trust and respect for your spouse because of what happened
- Your child is the only reason you’re staying together
- All you want is to get even with your partner
You’ve Tried Counseling but Still Can’t Make Things Work
Agreeing to seek counseling support is a good sign that both of you are willing to change your behaviors to improve your relationship. But if things still don’t work out after giving counseling a try, perhaps it’s time to accept the fact that your marriage is indeed doomed.
When you’re no longer happy with your spouse, it’s easy to take your discontent as a signal to end the marriage. But are you being rational? Is it worth it to go through the divorce process because you’re convinced that you’re better off alone? If you’ve considered all the signs above and are still unsure of what to do next, consult a divorce lawyer for your peace of mind.